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Drink From the Deep » God's heart, Love, Relationship » Married . . . but in love with another Man

Married . . . but in love with another Man

I am in love with another man.

It’s true.

My husband knows all about it.

And he approves.

How about you?

Who are the loves of your life?

I have several – but there is one that tops them all.

That’s right . . .

It’s God!

You know about Him . . . but do you know Him?

When I went to college, my roommates started talking about these guys who worked at the campus radio station that they had met.  My one roommate listened to their show faithfully and had superman fingers when it came to dialing through to win prizes they would give out.  They two of them would go down and pick up their loot and then hang out with the DJ’s.  They would come back and tell me all about them.

I had heard his name, had heard about him,

had learned what his major was and a little about his personality and more.

Jeremy West.  Hmmm . . . sounds like a decent guy.  Maybe one day I’ll meet him.

I didn’t really have any desire to go down with my roommates at that time, as I was kind of the “third wheel” in that relationship (they were best friends, and I had come to college half-way through the year – and basically was invading their room with my presence.).

Maybe I’ll meet Jeremy one day. . .

I did.

It was in the library.

He came up to the table my roommates and I were sitting at and just sat down, but didn’t introduce himself.  The others seemed to know him, but no introductions were given.  It wasn’t until his mechanical pencil stopped working and I offered to help fix it that I learned his name.  Jeremy West.  There it was – written plainly on the side of the pencil.

Oh . . . so you’re Jeremy West!  I’ve heard all about you.

From then on, I started to get to know Jeremy – not just know about him – by actually hanging out with him frequently.

We laughed, we talked, we enjoyed the fine cuisine of Taco Bell and then had fun at the dollar movies at Cinemark, we snuck back on campus after curfew because our movie ended too late, and more.  I watched and and got to experience his humor, his kindness, the way he treated me like a queen, how he was such a gentlemen when it came to my safety or comfort  – always holding my arm when I went down stairs or hills, and tucking a blanket in all around me when we were in his car in the winter (no heat!).

I really was getting to know him!

Months went by and we professed our love to each other.  But summer started the next day – and he was off to CA and I stayed in VA.

The first month I received pages and pages of letters.  The second month . . . less pages, more like paragraphs.  The third month . . . maybe a couple sentences.

By Sept, he wasn’t sure he wanted to be dating “this girl” he hadn’t seen all summer.  He came back to school ready to break it off.

But then he saw me . . . . 🙂

We went out for ice cream.  We started talking again.  We laughed, joked, ran around town having fun, and decided to continue our relationship.  By December – he asked me to marry him.  I joyously said Yes!

Do you know about God . . . or do you know Him?

  • What experiences have you had with God?
  • Do you know what makes Him happy?
  • Do you know how much He loves you?  How do you know?  What evidence or experiences have you had to prove that?
  • Do you know him personally, or just through the lives of someone else (like my roommates)?

I would never have known that Jeremy was “the one” by the descriptions my roommates gave me of him.  Nor by just looking at him and his crazy mix-matched and fluorescent clothes, his scary rust-colored (and rusted) diesel Chevy Chevette that had a really hard time going up a 10 degree incline with more than 2 people in the car, had no dashboard lights (we used a flashlight to see how fast we were going at night), and had no heat!  (My previous boyfriend had driven a BMW.)  There was not much there to attract me at first to him (he even weighed less than me!).

BUT – I did find out that he was the love of my life by spending time with him, by seeing how he treated me, how he loved on me, how he loved me, etc.

The same is true with God.  You have to spend time with Him to really get to know Him – and not just know about Him (from reading or hearing about him from others).


What can you do to get to really know Him today?


Spend some time in His word (the Bible).

Yes – there really are love letters to you in there! Start there!


Don’t just send up your Christmas wish-list of prayers.  Ask Him “What’s on your heart today God?”  And then LISTEN!  Keep a pen and paper handy, or your computer, to jot down what you think you hear Him say.  You might not be sure at first, and you will probably not get it right all the time . . . but keep spending time with him and practicing.  It’s like my neighbors – when they met each other, he only spoke English and she only spoke Spanish.  But they were determined to get to know each other -and they kept their Spanish/English dictionaries close by!  Did they misunderstand each other a lot in the beginning.  You bet ya! . . . So don’t give up.  The more you spend time listening to Him, the more you learn His voice!  I can pick out my husband’s or dad’s laugh in a crowded room.  Why?  Because I have spent so much time with them – that I know their voice!  I didn’t learn that through reading letters from them only. 🙂

Be open, humble and vulnerable before God.

He will not hurt you.  He loves you immensely!  There is an enemy that doesn’t want you to know this – and so he will lie and lie and lie to you, to deceive you into thinking that God is mad at you, that He can’t accept you because of what you have done (or haven’t done), that God is the one causing all the pain and hardship in your life, that God is unreachable, not interested, is like a judge just ready to pronounce judgement on you the minute you make a mistake, etc.

What is your perception of God?  Remember – my perception of Jeremy was drastically different – until I got to know him personally!  And even then, other people – who may have seen him, had class with him, etc – would try to tell me that he wasn’t the one for me, or they might not understand him – but they think they do.  People will do this to you too with God. 

Get to know God for yourself . . . personally.  Not just through someone else.

You just might find out that you too . . .

Are in love with a(nother) man! . . . And that He is passionately IN LOVE with YOU!


Do you know Him?

I love this video and just had to post it! Enjoy!

What is your relationship like with God?

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2 Responses to "Married . . . but in love with another Man"

  1. Bob Fox says:

    It is an awesome video! Great alliterative preaching with passion and great video presentation of the words. A classic!

  2. Bob Fox says:

    Great message here, too, Lori. So foundational. I am so proud of you for preaching it so well but even happier for you that you live it so well.

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